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Called into a meeting and told we are being made redundant (laid off) and “not to share outside”. Can I tell my partner?


Dealing with inaccurate job titles on CV, when HR contradict job descriptionHow to avoid a project subtly to avoid interacting with former bossPlaced on work schedule despite approved time-off request. Is it unreasonable to push back on this?My boss has made it very difficult to do my job, what can i do?Should I disclose mental health to my employer?













4















As title. Just been told we are being laid off, and asked to keep it confidential from anyone outside this room.



They sent us home "to absorb the news".



Is it really the case that we cannot tell partners/spouses and have to keep it to ourselves?



When can I tell my partner? or I have to get clearance to tell?



My partner is at home so I can't turn up late with this.










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  • 2





    They mean "anyone outside this room who also works here." They do not mean your partner/spouse. Of course you can tell your partner/spouse.

    – joeqwerty
    6 hours ago






  • 6





    Want are they going to do if you tell others - fire you?

    – henning
    6 hours ago











  • Please don't answer questions in comments. If you know the answer, write an answer.

    – DJClayworth
    6 hours ago











  • @henning Possibly, yes. At least in the UK, would save them on the non-trivial redundancy payments, and would also have consequences for future references and the like.

    – Philip Kendall
    5 hours ago






  • 4





    What did they give you in return for a promise of confidentiality? If nothing, then you can do whatever you like.

    – Joe Strazzere
    5 hours ago


















4















As title. Just been told we are being laid off, and asked to keep it confidential from anyone outside this room.



They sent us home "to absorb the news".



Is it really the case that we cannot tell partners/spouses and have to keep it to ourselves?



When can I tell my partner? or I have to get clearance to tell?



My partner is at home so I can't turn up late with this.










share|improve this question







New contributor




user100811 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.
















  • 2





    They mean "anyone outside this room who also works here." They do not mean your partner/spouse. Of course you can tell your partner/spouse.

    – joeqwerty
    6 hours ago






  • 6





    Want are they going to do if you tell others - fire you?

    – henning
    6 hours ago











  • Please don't answer questions in comments. If you know the answer, write an answer.

    – DJClayworth
    6 hours ago











  • @henning Possibly, yes. At least in the UK, would save them on the non-trivial redundancy payments, and would also have consequences for future references and the like.

    – Philip Kendall
    5 hours ago






  • 4





    What did they give you in return for a promise of confidentiality? If nothing, then you can do whatever you like.

    – Joe Strazzere
    5 hours ago
















4












4








4








As title. Just been told we are being laid off, and asked to keep it confidential from anyone outside this room.



They sent us home "to absorb the news".



Is it really the case that we cannot tell partners/spouses and have to keep it to ourselves?



When can I tell my partner? or I have to get clearance to tell?



My partner is at home so I can't turn up late with this.










share|improve this question







New contributor




user100811 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.












As title. Just been told we are being laid off, and asked to keep it confidential from anyone outside this room.



They sent us home "to absorb the news".



Is it really the case that we cannot tell partners/spouses and have to keep it to ourselves?



When can I tell my partner? or I have to get clearance to tell?



My partner is at home so I can't turn up late with this.







human-resources employer-relations mental-health






share|improve this question







New contributor




user100811 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.











share|improve this question







New contributor




user100811 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.









share|improve this question




share|improve this question






New contributor




user100811 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.









asked 6 hours ago









user100811user100811

211




211




New contributor




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New contributor





user100811 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
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user100811 is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.








  • 2





    They mean "anyone outside this room who also works here." They do not mean your partner/spouse. Of course you can tell your partner/spouse.

    – joeqwerty
    6 hours ago






  • 6





    Want are they going to do if you tell others - fire you?

    – henning
    6 hours ago











  • Please don't answer questions in comments. If you know the answer, write an answer.

    – DJClayworth
    6 hours ago











  • @henning Possibly, yes. At least in the UK, would save them on the non-trivial redundancy payments, and would also have consequences for future references and the like.

    – Philip Kendall
    5 hours ago






  • 4





    What did they give you in return for a promise of confidentiality? If nothing, then you can do whatever you like.

    – Joe Strazzere
    5 hours ago
















  • 2





    They mean "anyone outside this room who also works here." They do not mean your partner/spouse. Of course you can tell your partner/spouse.

    – joeqwerty
    6 hours ago






  • 6





    Want are they going to do if you tell others - fire you?

    – henning
    6 hours ago











  • Please don't answer questions in comments. If you know the answer, write an answer.

    – DJClayworth
    6 hours ago











  • @henning Possibly, yes. At least in the UK, would save them on the non-trivial redundancy payments, and would also have consequences for future references and the like.

    – Philip Kendall
    5 hours ago






  • 4





    What did they give you in return for a promise of confidentiality? If nothing, then you can do whatever you like.

    – Joe Strazzere
    5 hours ago










2




2





They mean "anyone outside this room who also works here." They do not mean your partner/spouse. Of course you can tell your partner/spouse.

– joeqwerty
6 hours ago





They mean "anyone outside this room who also works here." They do not mean your partner/spouse. Of course you can tell your partner/spouse.

– joeqwerty
6 hours ago




6




6





Want are they going to do if you tell others - fire you?

– henning
6 hours ago





Want are they going to do if you tell others - fire you?

– henning
6 hours ago













Please don't answer questions in comments. If you know the answer, write an answer.

– DJClayworth
6 hours ago





Please don't answer questions in comments. If you know the answer, write an answer.

– DJClayworth
6 hours ago













@henning Possibly, yes. At least in the UK, would save them on the non-trivial redundancy payments, and would also have consequences for future references and the like.

– Philip Kendall
5 hours ago





@henning Possibly, yes. At least in the UK, would save them on the non-trivial redundancy payments, and would also have consequences for future references and the like.

– Philip Kendall
5 hours ago




4




4





What did they give you in return for a promise of confidentiality? If nothing, then you can do whatever you like.

– Joe Strazzere
5 hours ago







What did they give you in return for a promise of confidentiality? If nothing, then you can do whatever you like.

– Joe Strazzere
5 hours ago












3 Answers
3






active

oldest

votes


















9














You're not in the army, in prison or at school - you can tell whoever you like. What are they going to do if you do ?






share|improve this answer































    3














    I would be astonished to find a jurisdiction that did not allow you to tell your partner. Many places, your partner cannot even be compelled to testify against you, so unless your partner passed the information along, nobody would ever know. That said, in telling your partner, you do become responsible for whomever they tell, if you're in a jurisdiction that provides a reason for you to not tell whomever you want.



    In any event, you can at least tell your partner that you need to find a new job, along with any headhunters, recruiters, or potential employers. There's nothing that says you'd need to explain. If pressed, you could always say, "I can't keep working there. I can't talk about it."






    share|improve this answer








    New contributor




    Ed Grimm is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
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      0














      Only you know your specific circumstances, but I can offer an example of a situation similar to yours.



      I have been laid off in corporate restructurings 5 times in my 20 years (I work in a technology field, so this is common). In one case, the HR person asked me not to discuss my layoff with others at the company while I was still permitted to be in the building. Her hope was that I would collect my things discreetly and leave. I considered her request to be reasonable and I left. I even offered to return to the company at a later time to collect my personal things when folks were not expected to be in the office and she agreed to help do this. I think we both were able to make the best out of a bad situation.



      Layoffs are tough, yet if you are asked to behave in odd ways by the people letting you, you can every obligation to clarify their expectations and to act professionally.






      share|improve this answer























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        3 Answers
        3






        active

        oldest

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        3 Answers
        3






        active

        oldest

        votes









        active

        oldest

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        active

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        9














        You're not in the army, in prison or at school - you can tell whoever you like. What are they going to do if you do ?






        share|improve this answer




























          9














          You're not in the army, in prison or at school - you can tell whoever you like. What are they going to do if you do ?






          share|improve this answer


























            9












            9








            9







            You're not in the army, in prison or at school - you can tell whoever you like. What are they going to do if you do ?






            share|improve this answer













            You're not in the army, in prison or at school - you can tell whoever you like. What are they going to do if you do ?







            share|improve this answer












            share|improve this answer



            share|improve this answer










            answered 5 hours ago









            MattMatt

            43329




            43329

























                3














                I would be astonished to find a jurisdiction that did not allow you to tell your partner. Many places, your partner cannot even be compelled to testify against you, so unless your partner passed the information along, nobody would ever know. That said, in telling your partner, you do become responsible for whomever they tell, if you're in a jurisdiction that provides a reason for you to not tell whomever you want.



                In any event, you can at least tell your partner that you need to find a new job, along with any headhunters, recruiters, or potential employers. There's nothing that says you'd need to explain. If pressed, you could always say, "I can't keep working there. I can't talk about it."






                share|improve this answer








                New contributor




                Ed Grimm is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
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                  3














                  I would be astonished to find a jurisdiction that did not allow you to tell your partner. Many places, your partner cannot even be compelled to testify against you, so unless your partner passed the information along, nobody would ever know. That said, in telling your partner, you do become responsible for whomever they tell, if you're in a jurisdiction that provides a reason for you to not tell whomever you want.



                  In any event, you can at least tell your partner that you need to find a new job, along with any headhunters, recruiters, or potential employers. There's nothing that says you'd need to explain. If pressed, you could always say, "I can't keep working there. I can't talk about it."






                  share|improve this answer








                  New contributor




                  Ed Grimm is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
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                    3












                    3








                    3







                    I would be astonished to find a jurisdiction that did not allow you to tell your partner. Many places, your partner cannot even be compelled to testify against you, so unless your partner passed the information along, nobody would ever know. That said, in telling your partner, you do become responsible for whomever they tell, if you're in a jurisdiction that provides a reason for you to not tell whomever you want.



                    In any event, you can at least tell your partner that you need to find a new job, along with any headhunters, recruiters, or potential employers. There's nothing that says you'd need to explain. If pressed, you could always say, "I can't keep working there. I can't talk about it."






                    share|improve this answer








                    New contributor




                    Ed Grimm is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
                    Check out our Code of Conduct.










                    I would be astonished to find a jurisdiction that did not allow you to tell your partner. Many places, your partner cannot even be compelled to testify against you, so unless your partner passed the information along, nobody would ever know. That said, in telling your partner, you do become responsible for whomever they tell, if you're in a jurisdiction that provides a reason for you to not tell whomever you want.



                    In any event, you can at least tell your partner that you need to find a new job, along with any headhunters, recruiters, or potential employers. There's nothing that says you'd need to explain. If pressed, you could always say, "I can't keep working there. I can't talk about it."







                    share|improve this answer








                    New contributor




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                    share|improve this answer



                    share|improve this answer






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                    answered 2 hours ago









                    Ed GrimmEd Grimm

                    1515




                    1515




                    New contributor




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                    New contributor





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                        0














                        Only you know your specific circumstances, but I can offer an example of a situation similar to yours.



                        I have been laid off in corporate restructurings 5 times in my 20 years (I work in a technology field, so this is common). In one case, the HR person asked me not to discuss my layoff with others at the company while I was still permitted to be in the building. Her hope was that I would collect my things discreetly and leave. I considered her request to be reasonable and I left. I even offered to return to the company at a later time to collect my personal things when folks were not expected to be in the office and she agreed to help do this. I think we both were able to make the best out of a bad situation.



                        Layoffs are tough, yet if you are asked to behave in odd ways by the people letting you, you can every obligation to clarify their expectations and to act professionally.






                        share|improve this answer




























                          0














                          Only you know your specific circumstances, but I can offer an example of a situation similar to yours.



                          I have been laid off in corporate restructurings 5 times in my 20 years (I work in a technology field, so this is common). In one case, the HR person asked me not to discuss my layoff with others at the company while I was still permitted to be in the building. Her hope was that I would collect my things discreetly and leave. I considered her request to be reasonable and I left. I even offered to return to the company at a later time to collect my personal things when folks were not expected to be in the office and she agreed to help do this. I think we both were able to make the best out of a bad situation.



                          Layoffs are tough, yet if you are asked to behave in odd ways by the people letting you, you can every obligation to clarify their expectations and to act professionally.






                          share|improve this answer


























                            0












                            0








                            0







                            Only you know your specific circumstances, but I can offer an example of a situation similar to yours.



                            I have been laid off in corporate restructurings 5 times in my 20 years (I work in a technology field, so this is common). In one case, the HR person asked me not to discuss my layoff with others at the company while I was still permitted to be in the building. Her hope was that I would collect my things discreetly and leave. I considered her request to be reasonable and I left. I even offered to return to the company at a later time to collect my personal things when folks were not expected to be in the office and she agreed to help do this. I think we both were able to make the best out of a bad situation.



                            Layoffs are tough, yet if you are asked to behave in odd ways by the people letting you, you can every obligation to clarify their expectations and to act professionally.






                            share|improve this answer













                            Only you know your specific circumstances, but I can offer an example of a situation similar to yours.



                            I have been laid off in corporate restructurings 5 times in my 20 years (I work in a technology field, so this is common). In one case, the HR person asked me not to discuss my layoff with others at the company while I was still permitted to be in the building. Her hope was that I would collect my things discreetly and leave. I considered her request to be reasonable and I left. I even offered to return to the company at a later time to collect my personal things when folks were not expected to be in the office and she agreed to help do this. I think we both were able to make the best out of a bad situation.



                            Layoffs are tough, yet if you are asked to behave in odd ways by the people letting you, you can every obligation to clarify their expectations and to act professionally.







                            share|improve this answer












                            share|improve this answer



                            share|improve this answer










                            answered 34 mins ago









                            user18539user18539

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